I have given up on trying to understand guys! I have accepted that I will be alone for the rest of my life!

I just don't get how he could say I miss you and lets plan to meet up and then out of the other side of his mouth say I just don't feel like company when the time comes. So I say to you my dear 3rd Grade- forget it. I give up trying to figure out what you want. Especially when you don't know. I am leaving you alone to find yourself. When you do, I may be around, I may not. Being friends with you is too hard right now. Starved crushes die and I hope this one won't be a slow death. While I am upset with you, I don't wish you ill. I just hope that you find what you are looking for. In time, I hope we really can be good friends because no matter what I will miss you.

Being a Brown Trout

So it would seem that in the world the fish the brown trout has it right. He doesn't chase the bait. He waits for the bait to come to him.

So I am practising to be a brown trout. I am tired of doing the chasing. Hell I'm tired of the chase. If 3rd grade wants me seriously, he is going to have to come to me. I can't keep pushing and nudging him along. I'm not saying that I will be a bitch but instead of putting an idea in his head and making him think its his own, it will actually have to be his own. I want this but he has to want this also. So I will be his friend. I will respond to him. But I won't lead him.

Big words. Lets see if my actions can back it up.....