Loosing is Winning!

OK. I just weighed myself- again. I lost another 3lbs. I have reached my 20lb goal and can go to West Palm Beach for my birthday weekend! I think this last fill reached my magic number in terms of liquid in my band. I can tell the difference in my legs and waist. I am so solid that I think it will take time for me to really notice the loss. One thing I have noticed is that I have dimples and that I lost a chin!

Some of my coworkers say they can see the loss. I never thought I would say this but I can't wait until I can hit the gym again! The doc doesn't want me in the gym until he sees me. At first I was happy to oblige. Now I crave the elliptical! Tell anyone and I will deny, deny, deny!

Its strange that I have to remind myself to eat. I have never had that problem. I'll have protein in the morning and if I am not at work, I won't remember to eat until dinner when I get really hungry. I am loving this.

It took me two and half years AFTER getting my Lap Band to get serious about loosing weight. I just got tired of being so heavy! Of praying that when I go to a restaurant that the chairs don't have sides so they don't dig into my hips! I refused to pay for two seats on a plane! I wanted to buy cute clothes. But what really spurred me on was my health. I have a bad knee. I'm 33 and I have degenerative osteoarthritis. I refuse to have to have a knee replacement like my mom and gram. My cholesterol is 156, which is up for me and my arm is so big that they must use a thigh cuff to get an accurate read on my blood pressure. At least that is on the low to normal side. I refuse to have to take more pills. I want to ride on roller coasters again!

So in this case, loosing weight is winning!

Obsession

So, I was invited a birthday party. A 40th birthday party for a friend/co-worker. I'm cool with the party. Not cool with the theme. Sex and the City. That means I have to dress up. I hate dressing up. My feet hurt just thinking about it. I do clean up well but all the tugging, pulling, sticking, moving and stuffing exhausts me! Not to mention I have to beat the face into submission.

Now I got my band closed a little bit more a couple of weeks ago. I am trying to wait until I go back to the orthopedic surgeon for my cortisone shot before hitting the gym again. I actually miss the gym but I will never admit it again. I weighed myself on Sunday. Today is Tuesday and I have lost 1.2 lbs if the scale is to be believed.

So I found a dress that I need to order. Of course I don't know how it will fit. So now I am obsessed with loosing enough weight by the middle of next month so the dress will fit well. I go to the docs on next Tuesday. I plan on being back into the gym by Thursday. Time to kick ass. I think.

I'mmmmmmm Baaaaacccccckkkkkkk!

....At least I think I am. Let's see how long it takes me to forget my password this time! As for life- Not much going on. I am dating Greasy again. He is from Ghana but works like a Jamaican. Then again if my rent were $1200 a month, I would be working like a Jamaican too! The good news is I see him most weekends and we talk everyday.

Work is crazy. I have actually been working overtime for the last couple of weeks. Now that I am off punishment (my caseload was a hot ass mess and I was confined to the office and had to have weekly one on ones with my boss. Fun!) My case load is finally under control and looking good and now I'm about to get some pretty messed up cases that will make my case load look like crap again! Damn job! But at least I have one.

I'm taking on a more active roll with my grandmother. This should be fun! When she is not calling me names I'll be taking her to doctor's appointments. If she pisses in my car I will put her out on the side of the road. I'll be good and actually stop the car first and I'll even pin her address to her!

My workout routine has hit a snag. Namely my knee is jacked up! I was on a roll too! But I see the surgeon on the 24th. In the mean time I do keep up my strengthening exercises when my knee is not swollen, hot and sore. I think it is time for a good ole cortisone shot!

Um that's about it for now......Over and Out!

Be Careful What You Wish For....Damn

I wished for a man with a job. I get a sweet guy who is a workaholic! I don't talk to him half the time because all he does is work! I hate his job because it takes time away from us. When I am in a relationship, I like to actually spend time with the person I am with. Not so with BMW. Why does he even bother if he is not going to try to work me. Then again, why am I even trying when he will not work with me? I guess I could say that I could have a man that has worse habits.

Anyway this is what I have chosen to do. I am going to keep seeing him until someone better comes along. Bad you say? So friggin what he needs to take care of home. Home is being with me and hanging out with my friends at least once a month. Is that too much to ask? For the guy that you are seeing to want to spend time with you and your friends. You can say that I am selfish and maybe I am but I am what I am. I like BMW very very very much. He just works too damn much. He needs to get it together before I move on to someone who does have it together. Nuf said.

New Year?

So it is 2010. I swore that this was gonna be my year. Maybe it will be. I wanted to get married this year. Then I just wanted to get engaged this year. Now, 3 days into 2010, I am just hoping that I will have have two consecutive dates with a someone who is straight all of the time. Is that asking a lot? No really, you would tell me right?

Take Me As I Am Damnit

For years I have been trying to shape myself into something that someone else would want. If I look this way or act this way I would be more attractive to guys. Then I really thought about it. Guys are attracted to me as I am now. True the majority may not be what I am looking for (toothless, old, criminals, etc) but there are some that I keep around (hey I kept Mail Man around for a year!)

As I loose weight (I had lap band surgery last year for those who didn't know) I find that I want someone to want me as I am and not as I will be. Does that make any sense? I am fat (yes I said it), loud, funny, bitchy and loving. Take it or leave it. If you don't love me the way that I am now, I'm not looking for you later!

Its Been a Long Time

I haven't blogged in ages. I guess that tells you how busy life has been. That and they blocked this site at work and this was one of my favorite ways to avoid doing my job! So my dears let me catch you up. Yes I am still single. Yes I am still in grad school. I swear it feels as if I will never graduate. Yes I still have a job- even with furloughs and salary reductions- thank God for that! I am addicted to Facebook. It is a great way to catch up with me and for me to see what is going on with everyone else.

I haven't been on a rant in a while and now that I think about it, I have something to say dammit! To the little bastard that decided to autograph my car with permanent marker- I hope your teeth fall out! Yeah I said it. Here I was at ghetto Target (Mondawmin) minding my own business. I come out to find that DEL wrote on the back of my driver's side mirror. How in the hell am I supposed to get that shit off? I mean you had nothing else better to do then write on a car? My car at that? I mean I don't drive a BMW or anything but my little Highlander is my baby and I don't appreciate it being defaced.

Ok rant over....for now....